The Democrats "New Direction For America"

(Courtesy of my buddy Tom)

So here we are, January 8th, the Dems are back in control, and what they've promised is "A New Direction for America". So let's talk about the direction that America was going in, which they now intend to change....shall we???

-The stock market is at a new all-time high and America's 401(k)s are back.
-Unemployment is at 25-year lows.
-Taxes are at 20-year lows.
-Federal tax revenues are at all-time highs.
-The Federal deficit is down almost 50%, just as predicted, over last year.
-Home valuations are up 200% over the past 3.5 years.
-Inflation is in check, hovering at 20-year lows.
-Not a single terrorist attack on US soil since 9/11/01.
-Osama bin Laden is living under a rock in a dark cave
- 95% of Al Qaeda's top dogs are either dead or in custody
-Several major terrorist attacks already thwarted by US and British Intel

So, if I'm right, the "New Direction" will take us to a time where:
The economy to go South
Illegals to go North
Taxes to go up
Employment to go down
Terrorism to come in
Tax breaks to go out
Social Security to go away
Health Care to go the same way gas prices have gone

However, I can gain comfort by knowing that all the Dems (Nancy, Hillary, John, Edward, Howard, Harry, Obama have worked hard to create a comprehensive:
National Security Plan (not)
National Health Care Plan (not now, nor when Hillary was the Healthcare Czar)
Immigration Reform Plan (not)
Gay Rights Plan (not)
Same Sex Marriage Plan (not)
Abortion On Demand Plan
Tolerance Of Everyone And Everything Plan
How To Return All Troops Home In The Next Six Months Plan
Get Tough Plan (adapted from the French Plan of the same name)
How Everyone Can Become As Wealthy As We Are Plan. Now I know why I feel good after the elections. I am going to be able to sleep so much better at nights knowing these dedicated politicians are thinking of me and my welfare.